The man called me a “trash panda.”
Verbatim from my text messages, the man I hired a month and a half ago to fine tune my nutrition said, “Dude. You went full trash panda on me.” He sent this during my Monday check in after reviewing the foods I logged into Myfitnesspal over the weekend.
To be fair, I did eat a pint of vanilla ice cream and six chocolate chip cookies.
The Why
Now, some of you may be asking the question, “uh dude, you’re the one writing the fitness advice, why did you hire a nutritionist? Don’t you know what to do?”
Long story short, I have some aspirations of creating a nutrition business side hustle of my own, and I wanted to experience being a client for someone who has created an entire living from changing people’s food habits. I asked myself the question, “how would I want my ideal nutrition client to act?” Then for the past month and a half I got to work meticulously weighing, measuring, and logging my foods so my food coach could see what I was up to.
And then something happened that I didn’t expect.
I got some gainz.
Accountability
Let me be frank, three years ago I had performed a successful cut where I dropped from a puffy 210lbs to a shredded 178lbs. I was already pretty good with my nutrition. A month and a half ago I had a solid ballpark understanding of how much I was currently eating, and I was fairly pleased with my performance and aesthetics.
Furthermore, the man hadn’t given me any advice I hadn’t heard before. I have listened to 100s of nutrition based podcasts and I have attended nutrition seminars and taken college nutrition courses. He was saying the same stuff.
I had hired a guy so I could learn his business kungfu, I didn’t expect crazy compelling changes to my weight room performance. And yet, just by virtue of paying for a guy to peer over my nutrition homework each week, I was beginning to see excellent forward progress in the gym. It was like someone turned down the gravity dial.
The little things I used to not think about began to add up. Suddenly, I couldn’t skip a meal because I wasn’t feelin it. I couldn’t casually snack on bullshit food without logging it. My goal of gaining some muscle mass suddenly had a 175 dollar price tag on it. If I wasn’t putting on size and lifting heavier weights, then what the hell was I doing paying that much money for zero difference in my life? Those are my precious teacher dollars dammit!
The experience made me realize the true value of hiring a nutritionist. I had outsourced accountability from myself to a third party. I can let myself down all day, but as soon as I give a guy $175 to call me a “trash panda” for my weekend antics, I have a whole lot more hate in my heart in order to stay on track.
It’s the best thing I’ve done for my performance in the weight room in a good long time.
What You’re Looking For
So here’s my advice if you’re looking for an effective nutritionist.
Find a person who charges you enough money that it stings when you don’t hit your macronutrient goals.
Find a person who can respectfully navigate your emotions when you don’t hit your goal over the weekend. Controlling your eating habits is an emotional accountability journey with yourself more than anything else.
Find a person who requires you to count your macros, and make sure they can see what you log. You may be surprised at how much of a difference that alone makes.
And yeah, they should know their stuff…but so should you. All the informations out there, you just have to sort and sift it.
And finally if you have any interest in working with me to dial in your own nutrition needs, stay tuned for 2024. This January I plan on starting a nutrition coaching business for anyone interested in pursuing health, aesthetic, and performance goals.
Feel free to email, dm, or leave a comment if you have any interest in participating.
Did you lose much in the way of strength when you cut that much weight?